How I became who I am today.

Growing up life wasn't perfect but I had everything I needed. Childhood was amazing. Grew up in the Hokianga, in the small valley of Pawarenga. Grandparents took care of my sister and I whilst mum and dad worked. When I was 13 we moved to Mangere in Auckland and attended, at that time, Mangere East intermediate. College years I attended Nga Tapuwae in Mangere for a year then attended Aorere College where I met my first partner. We had 3 children together and in our 10th year we married. Our marriage didn't last long due to insecurities and we decided to end our relationship. I moved on to my second partner and had another child 2 years later. The relationship was very toxic and very abusive. When it was happening I felt alone, depressed, unloved, angry, resentful, scared, anxious and everyday I felt I was walking on egg shells. I felt lost. I wish people understood better how hard it is to leave.

I was manipulated, intimidated, and I was scared to leave until 9 years later he hurt one of my children. I left and never turned back. For 2 years after that I turned to alcohol to numb the pain I was feeling. It took me that long to realize alcohol was not the answer, I gave it up and healed the right way for my children. I then fell into another relationship once again it was very toxic. This was harder for my children as they saw things that they should not have seen. It took another 10 years to realize that our relationship was going nowhere, we broke it off and now I am feeling better then ever. Through that relationship I became a grandmother which was the best thing ever. I had been successful through business in which I was tattooing. I had an online business which took me to America, and I was thriving.

My whole adult life I was mentally, physically and emotionally abused but I am now 47, in a healthy relationship with 4 children, 4 stepchildren and 13 grandchildren. I am half way through having my own microblading business, occasionally I am a tattooist and I am now living life to the full. I can confidently say that I am proud of myself, I turned my whole life around and I am very happy.

My journey has changed me in ways I never thought possible. Through self care, healing, and self motivation, it has made me strong and confident. I am happy and have become closer to all of my children. If I could say one thing to someone who is in the position I was, it is “Don't be scared, be strong and do what is best for you. Ask for help or talk to someone, don't be embarrassed. It won't be like this forever and, last but not least, you're not alone."

How I became who I am today.

Growing up life wasn't perfect but I had everything I needed. Childhood was amazing. Grew up in the Hokianga, in the small valley of Pawarenga. Grandparents took care of my sister and I whilst mum and dad worked. When I was 13 we moved to Mangere in Auckland and attended, at that time, Mangere East intermediate. College years I attended Nga Tapuwae in Mangere for a year then attended Aorere College where I met my first partner. We had 3 children together and in our 10th year we married. Our marriage didn't last long due to insecurities and we decided to end our relationship. I moved on to my second partner and had another child 2 years later. The relationship was very toxic and very abusive. When it was happening I felt alone, depressed, unloved, angry, resentful, scared, anxious and everyday I felt I was walking on egg shells. I felt lost. I wish people understood better how hard it is to leave.

I was manipulated, intimidated, and I was scared to leave until 9 years later he hurt one of my children. I left and never turned back. For 2 years after that I turned to alcohol to numb the pain I was feeling. It took me that long to realize alcohol was not the answer, I gave it up and healed the right way for my children. I then fell into another relationship once again it was very toxic. This was harder for my children as they saw things that they should not have seen. It took another 10 years to realize that our relationship was going nowhere, we broke it off and now I am feeling better then ever. Through that relationship I became a grandmother which was the best thing ever. I had been successful through business in which I was tattooing. I had an online business which took me to America, and I was thriving.

My whole adult life I was mentally, physically and emotionally abused but I am now 47, in a healthy relationship with 4 children, 4 stepchildren and 13 grandchildren. I am half way through having my own microblading business, occasionally I am a tattooist and I am now living life to the full. I can confidently say that I am proud of myself, I turned my whole life around and I am very happy.

My journey has changed me in ways I never thought possible. Through self care, healing, and self motivation, it has made me strong and confident. I am happy and have become closer to all of my children. If I could say one thing to someone who is in the position I was, it is “Don't be scared, be strong and do what is best for you. Ask for help or talk to someone, don't be embarrassed. It won't be like this forever and, last but not least, you're not alone."